My Photos

    This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from texasgurl. Make your own badge here.

Twitter Updates

    follow me on Twitter

    Who's in your area?

    • Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

    Creative Commons

    « Ahhhh-stin | Main | Another Day In Paradise »

    July 06, 2007


    Pollyanna Sunshine

    Holy hell, grrl. We ARE twins. Only I'm still the lame one.


    I have the same kind of feelings about my high school kinda boyfriend who I was completely obsessed with and then who dumped me to go back to his dumb, but very cute high school cheerleader X-girlfriend.

    The thing I finally realized is that the 17 year old girl who was so insecure just loves imagining that the 37 year old him is telling the 17 year old him that he was an idiot for choosing the idiot over me.

    love and memory gets very complicated.

    Pollyanna Sunshine

    For paida:

    aaryn b.

    from a girl who DID meet up with an old flame to the one who didn't:
    stay away. i repeat, hold steady. if you miss the thrill of the chase now, you'll be dying every moment after being reminded of precisely why it was so thrilling in the first place. remember i mentioned my marriage and "the brink" in one of my emails...?


    We never really leave high school. Not ever. It's like the bardo; we keep coming back to those same experiences and emotions, and then we try to live our "adult" lives somewhat differently. Maybe it's because high school was full of first times. I don't know.

    Several years ago, well before Natalie, I was in between girlfriends and decided to look up the first "love of my life." I found her. We met for coffee. And while I could still see some of what I saw in her then, that stuff had ceased to have the same impact, even in retrospect. Long story short, time had passed and it had changed us.

    It didn't ruin my idealized memories of our time together (and how brief that was, in post-40 hindsight). But it revealed them for what they were: rose-colored, highly edited vignettes scrubbed of the immaturity and cluelessness we use as SOPs at that age.

    geriatric emr

    Aw, that's really cute! I didn't know you have a story like this.


    The comments to this entry are closed.

    My Photo